My Mother Thinks I'm Always Drunk |
She's also rather fond of exclamation marks, capslock, and, apparently, me. At least she's not on Facebook. |
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My mother created this likeness of me.
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On a picture of a young Stephen Colbert that I sent her because it looks like her husband.
Mom: I sent it to everyone! I sent it to Todd's parents, I sent it to his siblings...It's so funny, it doesn't look anything like Steve Col-burt now though. Me: Stephen Col-*bair*... Mom: What? Me: His name is pronounced Stephen Col-*bair*. Mom: ...Are we talking about the same person? The guy from The Office. Me: No! Mom: Who's that? Me: That's Steve Carell! Mom: Well, who's Stephen Colbert then?...Is he from The John Daily Show?... Me: You mean The Daily Show with Jon Stewart?... And so on. -
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In response to an email in which I allude to an attachment that “isn’t there” (really, she just couldn’t find it).
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I don’t even know.
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In response to the news of an interview with Yoko Ono.
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In response to my flight itinerary, which expresses dates as date/month, rather than month/date...
Me: Keep in mind that they flip-flop the months and days [in Quebec], so that's December 8th and January 2nd, not August 12th and February 1st... Mom: What????? How do they make a mistake like that? Sasha dearest, I hope you're right!!!!!! -
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In response to…I don’t even know…
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In response to my first interview.
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In response to an email casually mentioning the discovery of our on-campus farmer’s market.
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No, she’s never seen this movie…
